Hmpf!

Those were the days when I was cracking my head above the academic issues and issues regarding my future. I'm turning the leaf to my usual Korean drama life! :P



There's this my friend from the art class, let's call him L.

He's the one that has invited me over for a coffee for a grand total of three times of which we have actually met for zero times, due to unknown reasons. :D At that time I found it rather ridiculous for him to invite me over for anything, I didn't know him that well and I didn't feel like guys should interest me at all, after the pleasant break up with R.

Time went by and we've became a really good friends, recently we've been together at a club, before that at a bar with his friends (I've been laughing for 1.5 hours straight; those guys were the funniest & freakiest lot I've met in a loooong long time) and then he has left for an awesome road trip around Europe with his friend.
We, of course, keep in touch, we text each other pretty often at what's new & how are things going and where are they and what's new with Dr. House.. :D :D :D Ah yes, he watches it too! :D

I sense that still kind of likes me *that* way...I assume that he has liked me *that* way even before, hence the still; people don't invite other people over for a coffee just because, do they? :P

And NOW!!!! I think I also do! And FUCK IT!!!! I'm leaving in SIX WEEKS, okay?!
Grrrr.

There are things that are pro doing anything significant around this issue:

1. I can hardly meet another dude with THAT of a lovely character & THAT of a freaky sense of humour
   
   
2. I live just ONCE! Grab the chance, bitch!
   
   
3. Six weeks is quite a lot, isn't it? Who knows, maybe we could last for three days. Live at presence, babe.
   
   

And then there are things that are contra doing anything significant around this issue:

1. I can hardly meet another dude with THAT of an addiction to cigs and apparently, to alcohol as well. Very gross. Cannot tahan.
   
   
2. I'm leaving in SIX WEEKS. 10 000km away. Wake up. WTD.
   
   
3. Maybe he is totally phlegmatic about me & I'm just seeing things, thus, doing anything would inevitably mean a total embarrassment. Not that I'm not used to embarrassing myself, but still!!!
   
   
4. Even if he liked me & we would hypothetically get together, I'd leave and then I'd be yet in ANOTHER long-distance relationship, now in the exactly opposite way as before (me in SK, bf in MY), now it'd be me in MY, bf in SK! Who wants THAT?!?! 12 hours long flight is a 12 hours long flight. WTP.

Jesus Christ, I'm not gonna elaborate on this any longer, it's too much of a Korean drama for my three brain cells. @_@ He's coming back from his road trip sooner or later and then will, hopefully, things clear out. Wahlau.

Good luck to me & good luck to hubooby with a similar problem! B-)

"No Time For Love"

Fine.
There's FINALLY/SADLY/LUCKILY nothing else for me to contemplate about because one episode of my drama of life has just ended.
It was bitter like a lemon fernet for me and I'm still swallowing it, but c'est la vie.....
Now.
To the point:

DOGGY: "How was your badminton? What, ain't the Prague option interesting for you?"

ME: "Not NOW, after the grad maybe...I'm in PN now....but then, I'll come...for 85%! "Life is about changes" as the Heracleitos from Efez has said!"

DOGGY: "I know. Is it there where those vinyls are? I won't be here (in SK) right after your grad but I'll surely come back later. And if I'm right, it's as the Epicuros has said: 'Foreigner, here you will feel good, here the pleasure is the biggest contentment.'"

ME: "Anyways, now I'm in PN and it's fine here; fresh strawberries in the garden, badminton, food, relax, music...aaaahh. :)"

DOGGY: "And what about the lovers? And the beer? I was kinda thinking when you were talking about that your ex....you're still waiting for your prince, aren't you?"

ME: "Hahaaa, today one guy that was dropping the flyers almost dropped off his bike when he saw me in a short skirt! :P And yes, I am waiting....and with my requirements I think I will, for a long time... =_="

DOGGY: "Don't you worry, those that would like to please you (physically, he meant), they are in heaps! You're just SMSing with one I guess.... But if you're waiting for your prince, it's not gonna be me. I don't have any time for love now."

ME: "Well, I could have LOTS of them last Friday at Dopler (SK version of the Zouk) but..no, thanks...I'm not in for shallow relationships. Is love for tennis enough to you? ;)"

DOGGY: "It is. It's just that sometimes one needs to vent out the hormones. If you'd have a similar problem someday, I'll be glad to help...but now I'm off to sleep. Nites & sweet dreams. I'm going to dream and I think it'll be about making love with you."

ME: "Good night and I hope there's a tennis racquet lying by your side.. ;) Well, and if you were calling me to come to CZ just so you'd be able to shag me, then I definately won't come. Sweet tennis dreams!"

DOGGY: "Nah, just like, for a visit. It's not like I can call you for anything else anyways (he has a gf but he's planning to break up with her after the grad).. Well, nitez and sweet dreams about the Miletian school." <--- I was studying the Philosophy, hence all these Philo jokes & references :)

ME: "Well, that's another speech now! I shall see. Take care!"






Wow, so kool, I've always wanted to be the one the guys wanna shag. =_=''''
Well.....no comment.
GUY READERS OF MY BLOG, PLEASE, TELL ME THAT YOU *DON'T* WANNA SHAG ME AS WELL!!!!!!!!!!!! @_#


My feminine dignity and pride is shattered. Gosh, if ALL GUYS are like this, I'll be a lesbian. =_= :P

The Two Chirping Birds

I have never believed on anything like SYMBOLS, SIGNS and etc., but I was forced to rethink it few days ago.
I have never 100%-ly believed even in this Feng Shui thing and I think I'll be forced to rethink it too. :P

Three days ago, in the morning, I was in the living room, just about to leave for the school. Suddenly, I heard a REALLY loud chirping and even though I was in a hurry, I turned around and saw two pretty birds on the balcony fence (or whatever) 'dancing' around each other.

It was *them* who were chirping so aloud.. And I was looking at them, smiling, they were chirping and then they flew away....still together. My mother hasn't noticed a thing.

"The birds?", I thought, "The birds are supposed to be a super positive sign according to the FS...and TWO birds, that may be a sign of a positive turn in my love life or something!"

Little I believed in that anyways and I went to school.
And then I came back home & logged into MSN & ICQ. I saw Doggy online and I was really tempted to IM him but then I collected all my pride & dignity and my hurt ego & told my friend:

"I'm NOT gonna IM him ANYMORE. It's leading from nowhere to nowhere & nothing's gonna happen anyways."

A minute later he IMed to me & invited me on mutual webcaming.


And from THAT DAY onwards I am chatting with Doggy almost everyday and he's inviting me to see him in Prague (there's a tournament these days) and to "listen to the music by the candles"...oh yes, and he has told me that the way I looked at him once on the webcam (but I swear that was just for fun!) was "really tough weapon" and so on.

O_o


Duck. I can't believe it's JUST BECAUSE. O_o
Who knows what's gonna happen today..tomorrow...later? :)

I have politely declined his Prague offer because I'm graduating in freaking few days and I need to STUDY, not to watch him playing tennis...haha...however...maybe I might go to CZ AFTER the graduation.

I just hope that things will go fine! If not, I'll kill those silly birds for making me believe in things that weren't for real! @_@ :P



*

Slovak lingo composition: 92,6%
English description: 90%
English graduation test: 92,5%


The ORAL GRADS are coming. I'm freaking out....it's not like I've studied too much. @_@ WISH ME LUCK & MANY MORE BIRDS ON THE FENCE, PLEASE. ^_^

Ducking Accurate

Just like PotatomusMaximus did, I had done it too & I took the Colorgenics test.





You are trying to establish yourself and make an impact despite the fact that everything around you seems to be against you - putting up barriers, but don't be unduly concerned: you have the right ideas and come what may, they will soon be manifested and appreciated.

Always anxious to accept the role of the leader, as indeed you often work well with people - but try to stay out of the limelight. You'd like a life of ease with no one to rock the boat and someone who understands you is so important in your life.

Being a very proud individual, you tend to hold yourself aloof pretending that you are stoical - indifferent to pain and pleasure. This is not so, for in truth you are an extremely emotional individual, one that may make a hasty decision and perhaps regret it at leisure. It is time now to break the bond of detachment and be the 'you' that you would like to be - give vent to your emotions and enjoy yourself.

Setback after setback has resulted in considerable stress and now you have got to the stage where you are continuously on your guard, not only to protect yourself from others but to protect yourself from yourself. It would seem that many of your unfulfilled hopes and dreams have led to uncertainty and suspicion. You no longer wish to answer to others and you are insisting on freedom of thought. You feel that you are fully self-sufficient and can control your own destiny. You are seeking ways to protect yourself from further loss of prestige and against further setbacks. You have become very dependent and you doubt that matters could possibly get any better in the immediate future and this negative attitude is leading you to exaggerate your claims and to refuse reasonable compromise.

You are trying to build up your own position and you resist all external influences. You insist that you are your own person and you will not tolerate any outside interference. Decisive and proud, you are true managerial material.


This is so ducking accurate, I can't even believe it. O_o


And I just did something stupid & I'm regretting it. Oh, I'm such a fuck.
Few days ago I msged Doggy. He didn't reply despite being online. Sure, my ego was hurt. So today I msged him something about yesterday when I might had seen him (dunno, it was dark) coming home when I was out with Haku and then I added:

"There's no place for paranoias of your choice, even though you seem to have an affection towards them...it's a nice place for walks with a dog! :)"


HOW MORE PATHETIC CAN I GET?!
I hate myself, I'm such an annoying bitch and I *know* he thinks so too. *sigh*
We know each other maybe for a week or so? Yet, I dunno what I want. I'm annoying & stuid, thankyouverymuch, I know it & I feel like kicking my own ass for that. =_= @_@

Okay, so this match is lost for me.

Good luck to DD with her new bf who endlessly loves her and she didn't have to move a finger for getting him...it just happened.


I'm off with Haku now.....and not *there*. KL, where are you? I need you! New life, new problems!

Flirt Or Not & The 360 Degree Change Of My Standard On Guys

I was SMSing with my boy friend Em today.



Me: "Hey you! Whaddya doin? :D"

Him: "I'm sitting in a cafe at the XY street thinking of you. ;) And you? :)"

Me: "I'm sitting in a cafe at the XX street thinking of sexy, blond and arrogant tennis players! :D"

Him: "Sob....and I can play tennis! :D"

Me: "BUT! You're not blonde!"

Him: "So I'll bleach my hair! :D"



Amazing. Kucci says he was just joking, but I wouldn't be so sure. He had invited me over for a coffee twice but it never worked out (not that I mind it). :P


Anyways, today I've talked to Doggy and he has replied to my msg on one stupid Slovak website a la Friendster where we both have profiles.
I've lost all my motivation for schooling as he's not gonna attend school regularly anymore cuz of his trainings. -_- NO MORE VISUAL PARADISE ON MATHS. Sigh. @_@ T_T :D

I am such a stupid 14 year old BSB fan. Hahahahaha. OK, I'm not, but I'm behaving like one. Very primitive. -_-

Anyways, Doggy has replied to that msg, so I've replied to him as well, caressing his ego (as you men like it). I typed there something playful along the lines of hoping to see him at Roland Garros next year and asking him where is he in the ranking of junior players and also I've offered to bring him some notes from the school if he wants as we're practically neighbours.

I'm so proud on that msg. XD
I let go of my pride and behaved like a stupid chick and now I'm testing it...wahahhahah....you BET he'll be glad. XD Poor boy, he doesn't know he's the only and the most important part of my test. :P





All this leads me to one thing.
My cousin was SO RIGHT when she said 6 years ago:

"You know, it's like, now you like guys who are similar to you and later on, you'll find out that you go for your complete opposites in whichever aspects."

I didn't believe her. Now I do. :P

My former standard on guys meant dark hair, dark eyes, Asians preferred and well, if the guy had to be an angmoh, I preferred an exotic look as well. I'd prefer sexy archs & designers with a lovely personality. Think Lee Min-Hyung in Winter Sonata.

And now?

I TOTALLY go for arrogant tennis players with blonde/reddish hair with blue or green eyes. OMD!!!! XD Think Doggy or Andy Roddick, Kucci's eternal love. :P


HOW FUNNY IS THIS?!

My cousin was oh so right. XD





I'd better go to bed right now, it's 1.14am, and I'm sooooooooo tired! *yawns*

On ProGamers

I was just watching the Arirang's Heart To Heart talkshow and there was this Polish dude with an honorable 'job' of a StarCraft ProGamer in the honoruable Korean ProGamers team.
Now, StarCraft is some stupid e-game where you probably kill some weirdos. I suppose it's like in all games for little boys; if you don't kill them, they'll kill YOU!

I love intelligent games.

Here's StarCraft:

(Credits)

This dude was a TYPICAL computer id....erm, geek. White as a ghost with glassy, empty eyes, 44kg, arms thinner than mine and a messy, ugly hair. He was wearing a white-lime green TEAM CLOTHING consisting of ugly pants and an ugly hoody. Cannot tahan.

He was speaking on how they're practising their idiotic StarCraft 13 hours a day and how it's very difficult, how he has no time and how the Korean computer idiots are much much better than those in Europe.

I've found a nice Polish (ah, the irony!) cartoon concerning the StarCraft Geeks. It's in Polish but I kind of understand it, so I'll translate it.

Year 1998:
The pig: "What Are you doing?"
The owl: "I'm playing StarCraft."

Year 2005:
The pig: "?"
The owl: "I'm playing StarCraft."

Year 2020:
The pig: "?"
The owl: "I'm playing StarCraft."

Year 2060:
The pig: "Oh no! Are you playing StarCraft?!"
The owl: "I'm downloading its newest stuff!!"


MUAHAHAHA, how accurate. The credits are *here*. ^^


Back to E-gamers.
WHAT KIND OF JOB IS THAT ANYWAYS?!
Oh duckness, I have a classmate who wants to become an e-gamer/progamer (however you call it) too and he so resembles this Polish dude. Only I dunno if this Polish dude also fancies porn with animals?! @_@

These people are DERANGED and nobody's gonna persuade me about the opposite.


The weirdest thing is, how importantly and normally is it regarded in Korea. Like, the e-gamers there are sort of heroic people.
Heroic for what ah?!
For masturbating 13 hours a day while playing idiotic games?! For being able to kill few virtual dudes in a virtual world with virtual everything?!

Wow, you hero, you've killed so many enemies.

Now, if I kick your 3cm thin arm, it'll get broken and you'll start crying cuz you're too weak to lift your sweaty hand from the mouse.


Ah, the irony again, there's this weekly (or even daily?) E-GAME MAGAZINE at Arirang now. The host is talking about how the dudes are playing, what they're playing, what strategies are they using and all.

I've watched it once.
In this episode 6 dudes went to the hairstylist to get a sexy haircut and then they had a photoshoot. OMFG, I thought I was hallucinating. A HAIRSTYLIST! A PHOTOSHOOT!!! For what ah? For some stupid upcoming e-gamers masturbating competition?!

Cannot tahan.


One day when I'll have a son, I'll NEVER let him even touch games like these. @_@ I can't risk him possibly dreaming about becoming a ProGamer. NO WAY.

These dudes should get a life, a girlfriend (so they won't be left to masturbating in front of hentai) and a brain.




Live and let live, they say.
I'm sooo tolerant but I can't understand these retards. If you happen to be an e-gamer reading my blog, at least you know now WHAT I think about your pathetic existence, thankyouverymuch.






Oh and on another note, I'm off top Piestany today and I'll be fucking busy. Aiyaaah! I'm supposed to work on my portfolios, learn English cuz of the TOEFL and there are voices whispering me stuffs about MATHS too but I dunno if I won't commit suicide hearing that word again. ARGHHH.

Take care duckies and see you on Sunday! ^_^

@_@


To the previous entry: Okay, I'd love to hug him (S) twice too. Or thrice. Why not ah! HAHAHA!!! He looks so funny & serious, that's the sexiest combination EVER!

Okay, I know that normal people find curly guys with rim-less glasses super fugly but I AM DIFFERENT. Teheheheheeeee.

Have I said I don't love him? Fuck, I dunno. But probably not. It's 50:50 I guess.
Oh, I wish I knew myself at least a tiny bit. -_-'''''


****


The nearest suitable test date for me is March 23th. FUCKING NEARBY!!!!!!! I AM SCARED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My mother was just threatening me that if I don't get into LKW/Cenfad/LA SALLE, I'll have to stay here & work. SCARY.

I dunno if I can make the TOEFL. Well, hopefully yes....... I MUST. O_O



Wish me luck. O_O

ANOTHER Unexpected Brand New Episode Of My Own Korean Drama

My life is so interesting for the past few days! :D

It started with *THIS*.
Now my Korean drama has taken a very unexpected turn with my art course friend E inviting me for a coffee on Saturday.

RENDEZVOUS? O_o *scratches head*

We were SMSing to each other when it happened.

Me: "Heeeeey E! Wazzup with your architecture entrance exams results?"
E: "Fucking terrible, fuck all the architects, they're assholes, aaaaaahhhh!!"
Me: "I'm sorry to hear that! :( But maybe it'll make you feel better that I ALSO wasn't accepted into the uni. :P Wanna try out marketing with me? XD"
E: "I know it for 15 mins and I got drunk already... I'm gonna go clean the toilets, fuck the uni!"
Me: "Oh PLEASE!!! You're behaving like a kid! It's not like the world is ending with you not getting into architecture! You can try it next year or just abroad where it's usually easier!"
E: "Okay, sorry, I'm really a kid. Nevermind.. Hey, why don't we go for a coffee on Saturday?"


I replied why not. :P
I wonder if it's a date?! O_o Hopefully not...I like E a lot....but I don't like him *THAT* much! @_#
Okay, let's just see what will happen. :)
I feel soooo femme fatale! XD




You think that was the end of my Korean drama?
NOT AT ALL!

Today I got a short & nervously pissed off email from my ex-bf telling me how he finds it pointless & stupid that our relationship ended because of some virtual non-existent conflict on MSN which hadn't even mirrored our real something...I don't remember what anymore. :P

*AHEM* =_=
No comment lah. I DON'T know what to reply to him at all. I know I have to reply to him though because if I don't, his parents & siblings will consider me a real asshole and that's what I don't wanna, cuz I really like them. :)
Stupid diplomacy. Grrr. -_-'''


This still wasn't the end of my Korean drama....
I've seen T today! ^___^
For those who have no idea who T is - it's a guy who damn much resembles S, my forever crush. :P
It's not gonna surprise you much when I say that I DO like T as well, right? :P I'm a really pathetic duck. XD

I looked at him briefly.....smiled just super-briefly....and went away because I was heading to the tram stop with UJ & AL. On the way there I couldn't resist turning my head around one more time and he was looking at me! :D ^___^'''''


YAY!!!! :D
I'm a CRUCHE FATALE! Hahaha! :D
(la cruche - duck in French)




It's an amazing & nice feeling of being so wanted but it's kinda headachy too because I really don't know what to do.... I don't know what to reply to ex-bf.....I don't know how to behave at the meeting/date? with E......I don't know how to hint T that it wouldn't be a bad idea if *he* invited me for a coffee as well....AIYAAAAH!!!!! @_# XD

I need some relax....I think too much.
Off I go to watch Girls Out Loud! ^^

The Unexpected Brand New Episode Of My Own Korean Drama

Today I happily opened the postbox and took out the three envelopes laying there. One was from the bank. The other was from the government or from wherever. These two were addressed on my mother's name.

Then there was the third envelope, beige, from the recycled paper, sleek & with Malaysian stamps. RM1,50.

I took it.
It was from my ex-boyfriend.
I opened it.
It was a THREE pages long letter written with a blue pen. O_O

I read it.

I feel very puzzled now. :P

It basically says that even after all that long time that has passed, he
still loves me, he doesn't want to be just "someone" to me; he doesn't want to
be a "friend" as well, because being a "friend" says nothing. He wants to be
someone who'll wait for me at the airport, who'll hug me & kiss me and etc.
He's not comfortable with me seeing guys either (ERM, SO...??!)....and he still
dreams about me.

W. T. P. O_o



What IS happening in this world?! O_o

A Day In Vienna With UJ & His 'Harem'

...to where I also belong. Hehehe, oh, such an honor, I think I'm gonna melt. XD

This entry's gonna be short, you must understand my exhaustion; yesterday after a lil party in the downtown with friends I came home shortly before the midnight, I couldn't fall asleep until 1.30am, I had to wake up at 7.15am, be at the railway station at 9.15am (I came 8.55am of course, I'm always too early), the train was departing at 9.40am and then..... We were walking, walking, shopping, shopping, walking, walking...between those mad thousands of people in the street buying Xmas gifts.....and I came home at 9.45pm.
MORE THAN TWELVE HOURS OF BEING ACTIVE. @_@

Let me sum up the day as much as I can!

The highlights:

• the DAMN PERFECT Friis & Company bag I bought to madre as an Xmas gift - it's so beautiful, if she won't like it, I think I'll change my identity and move away from Slovakia with a forever broken heart!!!! *__* ^^''''
  I loove that brand, they have perfect stuff. ^^
  
  
• the Vero Moda RED V-NECK TOP with that V-nech being reaaaally low, the top being as long as minidress and with its all concept being as stylish as OMFD!!!! *shiny eyes* ^_^
  
  
• the VIOLET SCARF by Promod I bought to my grandma - it's totally gonna fit her!!!
  
  
• the VANILLA - FOREST FRUIT pancake I had at the Schönnbrun Xmas market ^_^
  
  
• the ENDLESS HOURS OF LAUGHTER we've had - thanx!!! ^__^
  
  
• the GUYS!!!!!! --------> *eyes start to shine*
  
  
  I saw one hot Asian guy at the -1 level of Peek & Cloppenburg, OMFGDBPGFHJF!!!!!! *____* He was PERFECT, I swear. *love in eyes* Tall with broad shoulders, messy shiny black hair, radiant skin (not like mine now, fuck it), sparkling, beautiful eyes, wonderful smile, aaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  If God exists, then I don't like Him, cuz The Guy only glanced at me (while I was staring at him mesmerized, hahaha) and nothong happened. *sigh sigh* I swear I'd melt into a puddle of a glittery duckwater (don't ask :P) if he had told me anything, even "Oh, you need M from this purple colored pullover?" (he was the staff)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *__*
  CANNOT TAHAN.
  If I had a boyfriend like him, I'd probably be floating in the alpha level all the time. XD
  
  Then there was one another who, I think, was an E. T. cuz it's just humanly impossible to be THAT HOT. Darker blonde hair covering half of his face (bishounen style), dark grey-blue eyes, tall, lanky, broad shouders, bright blue polo t-shirt, dark brown V-neck (yes, my golfistas!!! :D), beautiful hands. OMFG!!!! *_* *_* *_*
  
  Still, if I had to choose (fuck, I mean, if I COULD even think of choosing..!), I'd choose the Asian guy cuz he was the prototype of The Guy. *_*
  
  
• the SPAGHETTI FRUTTI DI MARE at this weird, crappy restaurant where they think that fruit salad = canned fruit!!!! :D
  
  
• the NEW FRIENDS I made from 2B ^^
  
  

The darklights:
(highlights - darklights, geddit?! Hahahaaa, I'm so creative!)

• UJ & HIS IDIOTIC BEHAVIOUR TO ME.
  *takes a deep breath before a huge rant*
  
  He must REALLY think my only purpose in this world is to be there for him just like his parents, his iPod, his cellphone & his chewing gums.
  FUCKIN' ASSHOLE!!!!!!!
  As if it wasn't enough that on Friday I, again, had apparently too much time and agreed on going to check out some Motocentre & Applecentre somewhere in the whatever street in BA. NO ONE else but me would agree on such a stupidity and he, with his "independance" would never go alone so WTF.
  One would think he'd be thankful but fuck, he wasn't. And apart from him being dependant, spoiled, empty & pseudo-snobby, he also ain't emphatic & he can't listen.
  *fumes*
  
  The typical Friday's conversation of me & UJ:
  
  UJ: *eyes shining like those of my boy cousin when he was 6 years old*
  "And then I saw *this car*, and *that car* and *that car* and *that car* and OMG, today I see nothing interesting here, not like yesterday, aaah..!"
  Me: *reacts to his cars & then, after a pause with UJ being quiet says something else* "...I wonder how it's gonna be in that Egypt we're going to...I hope we'll visit the pyramides in Giza too!"
  UJ: *TOTALLY IGNORES WHAT I'VE JUST SAID* "...and *that car*, OMG!!!!!"
  
  I wouldn't mind that happening from time to time, but what that fucking happens all the time... I felt like I'm either gonna turn on the spot & leave or kick his dick.
  Respect? Like, what's that, dude?!
  AARRGGHH.
  
  And today. Today in Vienna, OMD.
  I've realized one thing. I'm too good for my own fucking good & too benevolent too, so this weak, spoiled, dependant ass likes to take advantage of me.
  
  Who is supposed (rarely is asked) to help him out by choosing his ugly long-sleeved, tight Hilfiger/G-Star/whatever t-shirts? Yeah, ME.
  Like, can I fucking go check out my own stuff?!
  Of course, I don't give a flying fuck & I go check out my own stuff, but WTF, what kinda attitude is that!?
  Actually he told me I pissed him off last time in Vienna, cuz I wasn't advising him by his buys!!!!
  Oh, THANX A LOT FOR YOUR FAITH IN MY TASTE but may I mention that your parents (who bought nothing for themselves) were giving you advices & choosing clothes for you for all the 3 hours or so?!
  I think 2 people are more than enough for this business, plus, the more intelligent & independant of us, like me, need no one to shopping but themselves. -_~
  
  Also, I'm his EGO BOOSTER.
  He just sooooooo loves to bring me down.
  I'm stupid. I'm ugly. I'm mad. I'm insane. I'm idiotic.
  Today I yelled at him at the Vienna underground that he's a dick cuz I just couldn't take it anymore...
  
  UJ: "Mich, hand me that pape from my bag, please."
  Me: "Which paper? This one?"
  UJ: "The paper."
  Me: "This paper?" *hands him the fahrkarte, i. e. the busticket*
  UJ: "That paper...like *that* paper!"
  Me: "Not this one? *puts the ticket back* You've got 2 papers here!"
  UJ: "That paper, OMG! The ticket!"
  Me: *loses nerves & yells* "I've been handing it to you 3 mins ago you dick!!!!!!!"
  UJ: "Oh, you stupid bitch!"
  
  CANNOT TAHAN.
  
  And the best thing - which is actually totally amusing me - is that whenever I salivate at some guys, it irritates him. Hahahahaha!!!!! XD XD XD I think he is jealous, cuz his personal belonging (me) salivates at other guys than him (who'd salivate at him though, hm?). XD WTP!!!! XD XD XD
  
  Me: *hearts in eyes, stares at The Guy* OMG, I loooove him, he's so...hot...cute..adorable....those eyes.....ooohhh...... I'm in love!!!! *_*"
  UJ: "Oh Jesus Christ, Mich, you're so stupid, shut up finally!!!!"
  
  
  
  One day when he'll grow up...he'll maybe be a good guy, but now..... CANNOT TAHAN. Girls, if you ever come to BA & meet him, please, have nothing to do with him, he's still psychically at a level of a 4 years old mommy's sweetheart. XD
  
  
• My COMPLEXION.
  I haven't had this kinda AWFUL complexion for million years already. Shiiiit!!!! KNN! TT_____TT I think it's cuz of all that stress, lack of sleep (and again, it's 1.14am, FUCK, I MUST GO TO BED RIGHT NOW!!!!) & the winter.
  
  I WANNA BE IN KUALA LUMPUR OR IN SINGAPORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! T____T
  

1.14am! Sorry to end it so abruptly, but really, I'm ugly enough not to make it worse by sleeping little even during the weekends. @_@

Have I said I am ugly???

Oh, Mich, don't listen to UJ, please!!!!


I am CANTIK, CANTIK, CANTIK!!!! And with the help of make-up I look even better. ^_~
You. Must. Only. Agree. With. Me. Cuz. I. Have. No. Self-Confidence. These. Days!!!!!!



Good night!!!! ^__^

I SERIOUSLY Don't Get Him

Me & UJ are not on good terms since today. Ahem.

He invited me for the glass plastics vernisage (?) few days ago saying that the sculptor is his late uncle. He also told me to ask Kucci whether she'd like to go or not..so I did. He didn't, however, bother to ask her personally, so Kucci said she doesn't care & won't go.
I still wanted to go cuz I like glass sculptures in general, they are so airy and beautiful....so on the recent art course I asked Emil (one my boy friend from there with face like a pussycat, hahahaaa) whether he'd like to go for an glass art exhibition on Thursday, 5pm.
He said he'll see, but in general, why not, he'd only have to skip tennis, but whatever.

So I told this to UJ today.

And he got angry at me, asked me who's Emil, told me he doesn't know him & it's not my exhibition to invite random people over.
Sorry sweetheart, but its not your exhibition either....even though the artist is your late uncle.

The last drop was when he told me that I'm NOT GOING as well.

FINE! But alright. Either me & Emil or nobody!
I wanted to take Emil with so I won't be yet again in the well-known situation of me, UJ & his whole family together. I wanted Emil to be there (since Kucci wouldn't go) so I could avoid all those small talks with UJ's family and then make them think happily that my "relationship" with UJ is blooming & growing and blahblahyaddayadda.

However, taking Emil with turned out to be a mad idea.
UJ DOESN'T WANT TO SHARE ME.
Do I get it right?!
My friends all agreed on the theory that he's jealous cuz he loves me and he actually enjoys the fact that everyone thinks me & him are dating.

Fucking annoying, sorry to say this, but if he loves me, he's showing it off like a 4 year old kindergarten boy.

It's just me to whom he's rude. It's just me whom he playfully slaps until I have bruises like recently on my right arm. ARRRGGHH. It's just me whom he takes to all his shoppings and then asks me about each piece of clothing he's trying on.
I mean, HELLOOO!!!!!!
UJ!
PLEASE!!!
@_@ Get a grip man and either confess to me or stop behaving like this. It's tiring. I'm already tired of your wannabe angry comments on whatever I do; I know that when you tell me in a 'disgusted' voice that I'm ugly, fat, stupid & insane you don't mean it. I AM NOT THAT BLIND.

Hello, boy.

You rested your head on my shoulder.

You told me to grab your arm recently at that class' fiesta when we all were out in a forest. When I didn't want to, you looked straight into my eyes and ASKED ME to. Hm.

You put your hand over mine & then, like a 3 year old boy, exclaimed in a wannabe disgusted voice "Eeeew! Your hand! OMG! How come it's here?!" or something like that. Good that before you did that, I saw you eyeing my hand; I suppose you wanted to know its precise location.

Hello, boy.
I wasn't sure about that but now I am: YOU DO LOVE ME.
I think I should be proud on that, cuz when a boy whose brain is full of Bang & Olufsen, Apple, Aston Martin & Range Rover happens to have feelings for someone; for me somemore!; it's certainly a MIRACLE.
You are a human with a heart. Mmmmmm. Great to know!

Still.
This your "OKAY! YOU AREN'T COMING THEN!" was the last drop. I think I'm gonna ignore you until you get your brain back. Jealousy? Pffff. I'm sad that you don't understand that even though I like you (not *that* way, although there were times like that, I confess) I won't date you. No, I WON'T. Why??? Cuz I'd break up with you. I AM SURE OF THAT.

MEN MEN MEN MEN MEN!!!!!!!

And fucking UJ, he infuriated me like never; I'm not one of HIS OWNNNNN Hilfiger jumpers to decide on whether I'm going alone or with some Emil when Emil was supposed to be a substitute for Kucci. KNN.

OK, I don't think this post made sense but whatever. He just came online to ICQ. I damn fucking bet he will NOT message me....and so I won't message him. Why should I, anyways? Pfff. =_-




Listening to: "Grandma" by Jay Chou
Yay!: I loooove Michelle, that my new friend from Grade 2. ^_^
Grrr: I'm FAILING MATHS. @_@

Lazy, Lazy, Lazy

It's Sunday today & my Sunday is held in the meaning of COMPLETE LAZINESS.
Shocking, ain't it. Ha ha ha.
So far all I did was chatting to people on ICQ, went out with Haku, got angry at the ducked up PC, ate & did manicure. WOOOW.

Yesterday I've been to Teresa's & Pedro's bday party and came home at 1.30am by feet again....aiyooh... WHEN WILL THERE BE A DAY WHEN I'LL BE HOME BEFORE MIDNIGHT???!!!! WHEN???? :P O_o
Maybe never. =_=

It's curious walking home alone in the quiet, nocturnal city... I had to cross the highway and for that I used the overhead for pedestrians... I saw the cars passing by under me, I saw the distant lights of the very historical downtown...I heard the rustling leaves on the trees...
AND I WAS OH SO DAMN ALONE.
I went half of the way with UJ who lives nearby me, but as he's everything but a gentleman, he gave a damn flying duck about walking me home - who cares, it's just 1.30am!!! - so I went totally alone for the last 15mins.

It'd be GREAT to have a boyfriend who'd walk me home at these late hours!!!
Bratislava is a safe city but still...you never know whom can you meet at 1.30am when walking upstairs through a park full of rustling trees. Hm.

*thinks of various cute Koreans in polo t-shirts*
*_*
^_^;;;

***

Yaaay, by the way, check out this Sang Woo's photo:

(*Credits*)

SO HANDSOME.
He looks so damn awesome & hot & lovely, like the perfect English gentleman, it stops my heart!!!! O_o *___* That irresistibly hot face! AAAHHHH!!!! *dies*


I'm over BYJ. ^_~ Hahahaha. KWON SANG WOO is the new SARANG of mine!!!! ^__^ *__* Saranghaeyo!

***

"La La La" by Se7en ROCKS DUCKS!!!! :D





It's still his mainstream R&B pop but I still love it. :P And he!!! OMD!!!! *_* *eyes pop out* VEEEERY VEEEERY HOT!!! ^_^
That girl....oh...couldn't she switch places with me? She'd be bored at home talking to people on ICQ and I'd be hugging Se7en and later kissing him. Muahahahaaa! B-)

***

I think my obligatory autumn depression is here liao!!! x_x

TO HELL WITH COLD WEATHER.
TO HELL WITH GREY & BLACK EVERYTHING.
TO HELL WITH CHILLY WIND, FOG & RAIN.
TO HELL WITH LIFE WITHOUT A NICE COAT.
TO HELL WITH LIFE WITHOUT A GREAT BOYFRIEND IN A NICE COAT. (Hahahaaaa)

AAARGGHHHH!!!!! >_< @_#




Listening to: "Hot In Herre" by Nelly on a radio
Yay!: Ehh...my pretty nails? -_- *yawn*
Grrr: I WANT THE FUCKING SUMMER BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

99 Secrets

Check out what I've found at the SGClub!





1. Guys don't actually look after good-looking girls. They prefer neat and presentable girls. (Fine, you all should love me, I like the polo t-shirt, V-neck golf look now. There's hardly anything NEATER!!! :P)

2. Guys hate flirts. (Ehm? But one my boy friend told me that guys can't resist a deep, flirty look into his eyes. Or they means flirts as...girls flirts? OK, I'm bodoh. :P)

3. A guy can like you for a minute, and then forget you afterwards.

4. When a guy says he doesn't understand you, it simply means you're not thinking the way he is.

5. "Are you doing something?" or "Have you eaten already?" are the first usual questions a guy asks on the phone just to get out from stammering.

6. Guys may be flirting around all day but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about. (Do they?)

7. When a guy really likes you, he'll disregard all your bad characteristics.

8. Guys go crazy over a girl's smile.

9. Guys will do anything just to get the girl's attention.

10. Guys hate it when you talk about your ex-boyfriend.

11. When guys want to meet your parents. Let them.

12. Guys want to tell you many things but they can't. And they sure have one habit to gain courage and spirit to tell you many things and it is drinking! (Primitives!!!! >_<)

13. Guys cry!!!

14. Don't provoke the guy to heat up. Believe me. He will.

15. Guys can never dream and hope too much.

16. Guys usually try hard to get the girl who has dumped them, and this makes it harder for them to accept their defeat.

17. When you touch a guy's heart, there's no turning back.

18. Giving a guy a hanging message like "You know what?!..uh...never mind!" Would make him jump to a conclusion that is far from what you are thinking.

19. Guys go crazy when girls touch their hands.

20. Guys are good flatterers when courting but they usually stammer when they talk to a girl they really like.

21. When a guy makes a prolonged "umm" or makes any excuses when you're asking him to do you a favor, he's actually saying that he doesn't like you and he can't lay down the card for you.

22. When a girl says "no", a guy hears it as "try again tomorrow."

23. You have to tell a guy what you really want before he gets the message clearly.

24. Guys hate gays! (My cousin is the living example of this...and so is my father.)

25. Guys love their moms. (UJ. Ha ha ha. Mommy's sweetheart.)

26. A guy would sacrifice his money for lunch just to get you a couple of roses. (I don't believe this!!!!!)

27. A guy often thinks about the girl who likes him. But this doesn't mean that the guy likes her.

28 You can never understand him unless you listen to him.

29. If a guy tells you he loves you once in a lifetime. He does.

30. Beware. Guys can make gossips scatter through half of the face of the earth faster than girls can.

31. Like Eve, girls are guys' weaknesses.

32. Guys are very open about themselves.

33. It's good to test a guy first before you believe him. But don't let him wait that long.

34. No guy is bad when he is courting. (U sexy gal ok i wana hev sex wid u tonihgt ok ur boobs soe byg oooh u sexy thing wanna kissy kiss kiss ok ok bye - NO GUY IS BAD?! YEAH??? I love this young gentleman: www.ikissyou.org WAHAHAHAAAAAA~~~ XD)

35. Guys hate it when their clothes get dirty, even a small dot. (I wouldn't say so. -_~)

36. Guys really admire girls that they like even if they're not that much pretty.

37. Your best friend, whom your boyfriend seeks help from about his problems with you may end up being admired by your boyfriend.

38. If a guy tells you about his problems, he just needs someone to listen to him. You don't need to give advice.

39. A usual act that proves that the guy likes you is when he teases you. (OKEH. So UJ probably loves me happily ever after cuz all he does is TEASING ME. WTP arr!)

40. A guy finds ways to keep you off from linking with someone else.

41. Guys love girls with brains more than girls in miniskirts. (HAHAHAHAHAAAAAA, yeeeees, and no guys drink, smoke and watch porn, instead they read Shakespeare's books, play chess and iron clothes, AM I RIGHT???? *sarcastic laughter*)

42. Guys try to find the stuffed toy a girl wants but would unluckily get the wrong one.

43. Guys virtually brag about anything.

44. Guys cannot keep secrets that girls tell them.

45. Guys think too much. (I haven't noticed it yet. Well...okay...mai baibee is an exception. ^_~)

46. Guys' fantasies are unlimited.

47. Girls' height doesn't really matter to a guy but her weight does!

48. Guys tend to get serious with their relationship and become too possessive. So watch out girls!!!

49. When a girl makes the boy suffer during courtship, it would be hard for him to let go of that girl.

50. It's not easy for a guy to let go of his girlfriend after they broke up especially when they've been together for 3 years or more. (Yup, and the girl takes it easily, hm?)

51. You have to tell a guy what you really want before getting involved with that guy.

52. A guy has to experience rejection, because if he's too-good-never-been-busted, never been in love and hurt, he won't be matured and grow up. (HAVE YOU HEARD & UNDERSTOOD IT, ALL YOU CHILDLISH BEINGS OUT THERE???)

53. When an unlikable circumstance comes, guys blame themselves a lot more than girls do. They could even hurt themselves physically.

54. Guys have strong passion to change but have weak will power.

55. Guys are tigers in their peer groups but become tamed pussycats with their girlfriends.

56. When a guy pretends to be calm, check if he's sweating. You'll probably see that he is nervous.

57. When a guy says he is going crazy about the girl. He really is.

58. When a guy asks you to leave him alone, he's just actually saying, "Please come and listen to me"

59. Guys don't really have final decisions.

60. When a guy loves you, bring out the best in him.

61. If a guy starts to talk seriously, listen to him.

62. If a guy has been kept shut or silent, say something.

63. Guys believe that there's no such thing as love at first sight, but court the girls anyway and then realize at the end that he is wrong.

64. Guys like femininity not feebleness.

65. Guys don't like girls who punch harder than they do.

66. A guy may instantly know if the girl likes him but can never be sure unless the girl tells him.

67. A guy would waste his time over video games and basketball, the way a girl would do over her romance novels and make-ups.

68. Guys love girls who can cook or bake. (Girls like me love GUYS who can cook or bake. Anybody like that out there? ~_^)

69. Guys like girls who are like their moms. No kidding! (Weird.)

70. A guy has more problems than you can see with your naked eyes.

71. A guy's friend knows everything about him. Use this to your advantage.

72. Don't be a snob. Guys may easily give up on the first sign of rejection.

73. Don't be biased. Try loving a guy without prejudice and you'll be surprised.

74. Girls who bathe in their eau de perfumes do more repelling than attracting guys.

75. Guys are more talkative than girls are especially when the topic is about girls.

76. Guys don't comprehend the statement "Get lost" too well. (Yeah, I've noticed that liao. Grrrr.)

77. Guys really think that girls are strange and have unpredictable decisions but still love them more.

78. When a guy gives a crooked or pretentious grin at your jokes, he finds them offending and he just tried to be polite.

79. Guys don't care about how shiny their shoes are unlike girls.

80. Guys tend to generalize about girls but once they get to know them, they'll realize they're wrong.

81. Any guy can handle his problems all by his own. He's just too stubborn to deal with it.

82. Guys find it so objectionable when a girl swears.

83. Guys' weakest point is at the knee.

84. When a problem arises, a guy usually keeps himself cool but is already thinking of a way out.

85. When a guy is conscious of his looks, it shows he is not good at fixing things. (Interesthong theory :P)

86. When a guy looks at you, either he's amazed of you or he's criticizing you.

87. When you catch him cheating on you and he asks for a second chance, give it to him. But when you catch him again and he asks for another chance, ignore him.

88. If a guy lets you go, he really loves you. (I don't understand this; EXPLANATION, anyone??? O_o)

89. If you have a boyfriend, and your boy best friend always glances at you and it obviously shows that he is jealous whenever you're with your boyfriend, all I can say is your boy best friend loves you more than your boyfriend does.

90. Guys learn from experience not from the romance books that girls read and take as their basis of experience.

91. You can tell if a guy is really hurt or in pain when he cries in front of you!

92. If a guy suddenly asks you for a date, ask him first why.

93. When a guy says he can't sleep if he doesn't hear your voice even just for one night, hang up. He also tells that to another girl. He only flatters you and sometimes makes fun of you.

94. You can truly say that a guy has good intentions if you see him praying sometimes. (What about ateists & agnostics? Ha?!)

95. Guys seek for advice not from a guy but from a girl.

96. Girls are allowed to touch boys' things. Not their hair! (Yeah, I've noticed liao too. :P)

97. If a guy says you're beautiful, that guy likes you. (UJ once told me this but I'm not sure if he meant it seriously or sarcastically. :P)

98. Guys hate girls who overreact.

99. Guys love you more than you love them if they are serious in your relationships.





Interesting!

***

I'll share a thing with you.
I MISS NOT BEING CRAZY HEAD OVER FEATHERS WITH S.
I haven't seen him for like a half-year liao and therefore his face in my mind is fading...and fading...and even though he will always be in my mind ,(he is graffitti-ed to my brain after those 7 years of platonic love *weak smile*) my heart has lost that OOMPH.

I think about him trying to recall whatever detail.....and what do I feel?

Nothing much, really. -_- *sigh* I still remember how much I loved (or was just infatuated with?) him but now when I think about him, I don't feel those old feelings anymore.

Sure, we grow and with us growing, our heart grows too. Or so I believe.

I must sound like a mad schizophrenic to you now, don't I? :)
First I wail that *I'm sooo much in love with S & he'll never love me back & I MUST forget him and move on*..............................and when it happens (or it looks like so) I wail again, now at the fact that all *that* happened.

I shouldn't miss it....but....by losing the last bits of interest in S I feel like I've lost a part of me. It sounds really weird & totally anti-girl-powerish BUT really, I feel so.
You wouldn't understand me, unless you've had such a long-term platonic love as me. :P

S is also responsible for me being who I am - I tried to be beautiful, neat, charming, well-behaved & polite whether in front of him (when I met/saw him) or just when I thought about him, checked my looks & my behaviour and then asked myself what would he think about it....yeah, I corrected myself, I tried hard to be THE GIRL.
Pathetic, isn't it...... hahahaha... :P
Ironic too, as we know about the 575645 times when I got completely emmbarrased in front of him. HAHA!!! XD
I'll be telling about that to my grandkids one day. XD ^_~


As the time went by, I accepted that I'll never, NEVER date him...I'll never be his girlfriend, that it's not possible....and I even managed not to die of jealousy when I saw him in the downtown holding hands with that his blonde girlfriend.
I hope he's happy. :)
(Seems like I haven't lost the oomph completely :P - my inner voice squeaked into my ear just now: "YEAH! You hope he's happy?!Don't you lie, girl. You want him to be happy - but you'd prefer him being so with you and nobody else.")


BUT STILL!!!!

DAMN!
I wanna see him....I wanna....!
I'll be here for *counts on fingers* 10 more months (if the intake to Cenfad is in September) and then...not anymore, only during the Xmas. My point is - relatively soon I'm leaving and before I leave I wanna see my longest platonic love once again so I can remember him forever. :)
Cheesy. EWWWW.
But S is someone really special....I will never forget him.

Hmmm.
Actually....as I'm thinking about it once again, I have to say that I HAVEN'T lost the oomph nor the feelings for him - I just haven't seen him for such a long time and that made him fall into the back of my brain (but there he's having a good time, I hope).

I smile whenever the trolleybus passes by or stops at the bus stop where he used to get off.
I squint at the cars passing me by from Koliba if there is his Fiat Punto.

Yes, even until today. I'm such a pathetic girl. :P




Hmmm....actually... I wish I had a boyfriend now! ^^
Well, EHM, I think I could always get UJ (believe me, it wouldn't be that difficult, but I can't imagine kissing him, I just can't imagine him being my serious, real bf - damn absurd) but nope - my ambitions are higher! B-)
Maybe there'll be some outstanding Asian guys in Vienna on Friday!!!! B-))) Wish me luck.... I'm gonna flirt like there's no tommorrow...while shopping. Hahaha. :P


12.38am? O_o
Whoops..I'd quack more but I can't because I still haven't even taken a shower and tmr I wake up at 7.45am. Aaaah, this daily routine... =_=


Listening to: FunRadio
Yay!: I'm gonna buy nice, black pants on Fri. Mmmmm.
Grrr: I wrote that Maths today and....5 I think. Another one. *bangs head* So far I'm flunking Maths. @_#