Tuesday, February 06, 2007


I seriously hate it how scatterbrained, unfocused, messy, procrastinating & lazy I am!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I must do something about this.

Whatever schedule I set up for myself, I almost never behave according to it. For example, I'm already telling myself since December that I have to register for TOEFL. Grrr!


I'm editing this few hours later (11pm) & I can't continue on that topic anymore.

I AM SO FUCKING ANGRY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

My mother was again way tipsy, reeking of her fucking wine & being aggresive to whatever I said. Fucking bitch!

Tmr she's gonna meet that dude from Graphic Design at 10am at Steam & Coffee.
It's all gonna be about me. WHOLE the fucking thing.

AND I CAN'T GO THERE CUZ I MUST GO TO SCHOOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Who is she to tell me where to go & what to do?!
ARGH, I'm soooo waiting for my 18th bday to come. I'll finally be fucking independant (sadly, not really because I happened not to be born as prince William/Paris Hilton/Mary-Kate/Ashley Olsen)!!!

Cannot tahan this.
And she didn't even get it; she thought I want to manipulate that dude & everyone so we can meet up later on....even though I was saying that I wanna GO there at that 10am!!!!
And she yelled at me what I think about myself & that for further questions I should "contact the president's office".


I'm also a naive, infantile, irresponsible & dependant kid according to her.
Should I let her spend one day with UJ?! She'll think he's still just gonna be conceived!!!!! AAARGGGHHHHH. >_< @_@

I must calm myself down.

Must make myself smile.

Must forget my anger. I'm a very angry person by the way; I wasn't but since those years of my mother's alcoholism I had became a very cynical, angry, sarcastic asshole. Thank you, if you still like me.


*searches for relaxing pictures*

Did it help?
Not much. =_=


I've decided on applying for THREE schools:

CENFAD (Kuala Lumpur)
LIMKOKWING (Cyberjaya)
LA SALLE-SIA (Singapore)

The La Salle enrolment policy is that I have to enclose the personal statement & various blahblahs about myself & my relevant successes, courses & exhibitions (I had one!) and that's gonna be fun creating.... ^^ I also - of course - have to create a portfolio consisting of 10 works relevant to the course I've chosen (Graphic Design).

The ducks at LKW don't require any portfolio when I'm applying for the Foundation in Design Innovation 1-year course to which I'll be applying as it's the pre-requisite for the BA Graphic Design course.

And the ducks at Cenfad want my portfolio consisiting of 4 artworks on the set themes.

All three schools want the TOEFL/IELTS so I'd better move my fat ass & get it done ASAP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! @_#

I'll be sooooo busy.
14 PERFECT artworks to create (but really PERFECT!!!), graduate, get TOEFL.... OOOOHHH, ALMIGHTY DUCK, GIMME STRENGHT AND THE POWER NOT TO PROCRASTINATE!!!!!!! :D

I totally love drawing & painting now. ^^ At least that, otherways I wouldn't get anywhere...but art....mmmm... ^^ My art prof will help me with both portfolios, that's so kool. ^^

Midnight already. I am going to take a shower....then sleep...and SCHOOL AGAIN. Arrghh, how I hate this terroristic routine!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!x_x *fumes*

No comments: