Sunday, May 21, 2006

Memoirs Of An Ignored Half-Sister

Yeah, the title is inspired by the Memoirs Of A Geisha I've seen today & it ROCKED DUCK. So poetic... I LOVE poetic movies. *_* ^__^ I recommend it a lot, in case you haven't seen it yet... It was sad, beautiful, poetic, AZN, sentimental & ending in a nice happyend. Lucky baka Sayuri, she got him... when will I? *sighs & thinks of curly hair*


Have you ever felt unwanted, useless, like a stinky sack of shit which no one wants?

That's the way I'm feeling now.

I have a half-brother. He's the son of my father & his previous wife & his name is Tomas. Tomas doesn't have a sister though.
Know why?
I've SMSed him like last month suggesting that we should meet sometime. He hasn't replied; I was alright with it, I thought he has changed his number & in order to find out his new number I've decided to rudely look into my father's mobile phone. I did that now...sneakily...feeling guilty, for I respect other people's privacy greatly & even though I'm gila, I have some manners.
The bad truth is, Tomas hasn't changed his number. He has just decided to ignore me. ME! ME!!! His fucking younger half-sister!!!!!


I'll stop dreaming on how wonderful would it be to meet up with him, go for a coffee (tea in my case) with him, SMS with him, discuss things with him... To call out his name & KNOW that I'm no longer alone, for I have a half-brother, my older dear half-bro who'll be there for me when I need him & vice versa... I'll stop daydreaming of asking Tomas as many things as possible in order to catch up with all things I don't know about him for I've lived whole my fucking life without knowing him... I'll never imagine Tomas asking me about myself, interested in me, in his younger half-sis!!!

That fucking bastard has decided to IGNORE me, to pretend that I DO NOT EXIST, to IMAGINE that his father has never shagged another woman so I was born!!!!

I'm speechless. I'm really at a loss of words, I dunno what to say... It's just... disappoiting. Yeah, that'd be the word. I've always imagined Tomas as an intelligent, caring, funny, well-mannered dude. What's the reality? He's a FUCKING BASTARD.

Fine. =_=

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